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Title: Cold Humor in the Spirit of Marty Post by: valhalla on 31-Dec-09, 10:53:25 AM For new members, Marty is one of our deceased members who had a large group of friends who sent her a variety of jokes - some of which she could share here with all of us (the rest we received off line). :laugh: In the spirit of Marty, I'm sharing the following:
COLD IS A RELATIVE THING. 65 above zero: Floridians turn on the heat. People in Upstate New York plant gardens. 60 above zero: Californians shiver uncontrollably. People in Upstate New York sunbathe. 50 above zero: Italian & English cars won't start. People in Upstate New York drive with the windows down. 40 above zero: Georgians don coats, thermal underwear, gloves, and wool hats. People in Upstate New York throw on a flannel shirt. 35 above zero: New York city landlords finally turn up the heat. People in Upstate New York have the last cookout before it gets cold. 20 above Zero: People in Miami all die. Upstate New Yorkers close the windows. Zero: Californians fly away to Mexico . People in Upstate New York get out their winter coats. 10 below zero: Hollywood disintegrates. The Girl Scouts in Upstate New York are selling cookies door to door. 20 below zero: Washington DC runs out of hot air. People in Upstate New York let the dogs sleep indoors. 30 below zero: Santa Claus abandons the North Pole. Upstate New Yorkers get upset because they can't start the snow-mobile. 40 below zero: ALL atomic motion stops. People in Upstate New York start saying...'cold enough fer ya?' 50 below zero: Hell freezes over. Upstate New York public schools will open 2 hours late. :scaredblue: |