UNIVERSITY PARK — Beneath last night's snowy sky, the epic struggle of man versus crow kicked off with a bang.
And another bang. And another. Until at least 500 pyrotechnics — called “bangers” and “screamers” — had been ignited in hopes of shooing 3,000 migrant black birds, feces and all, from campus.
It’s the crow show. And it’s celebrating its second anniversary.
“The crows have minds of their own,” said Office of Physical Plant spokesman Paul Ruskin. “We haven’t had anyone attacked, but we’ve gotten calls from people who feel threatened by the crows, because there are so many of them.”
Janitors by day, 16 OPP workers donned protective eyeglasses, earplugs, and blue vests with fluorescent green stripes, which provided little protection from the below-freezing temperatures. They toted red and yellow boxes adorned with crow cartoon characters, labeled “Bird Bangers” and “Screamer Siren.”
Six were armed with six-inch orange, toylike pistols to launch the fireworks eastward from north campus.
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“Everybody get loaded up,” OPP supervisor Jeremy Smith said into his walkie talkie, signaling for the first shot at 5:50 p.m. “Commence at will.”
The “screamers” make high-pitched squealing sounds, like bottle rockets, as their spiraling trails of orange sparks illuminate the sky, making crows think they’re being chased.
“It’s like the Fourth of July, but I guess — not as pretty,” said OPP maintenance worker Chris Diehl, 23, of Tyrone, as he fired off another round.
“Bangers” send the crows flying from their roosting areas and sound like gunshots when they explode about 75 feet in the air.
Residents can expect the same noises every night this week, Smith said. Despite efforts of OPP to inform the public, the sounds were initially alarming to unsuspecting passers-by.
“What’s the occasion?” asked Jeff Berger, a grad student on his way to Wagner Building. “I heard the noise while I was listening to my heavy metal and wondered who had brought Baghdad to Penn State.”
Officials are hoping to relocate the crows, which are roosting in north campus, to a clump of trees east of the visitors’ center or the duck pond near the university’s wastewater treatment facility. Today, OPP’s tree crew will hang dead crow effigies in the trees of Hort Woods to further alarm the birds.
“Most people don’t really realize it’s a problem,” Smith said. “You don’t know they’re here until they poop on you.”
Currently, the airborne nuisances are scattering their droppings across sidewalks near the Agricultural Administration Building on Shortlidge Road.
“If you’re in a wheelchair, you can’t go up a sidewalk that’s covered in droppings,” Ruskin said. “The action of using the wheelchair gets droppings on your hand.”
Some students passing by last night said they don’t mind the crows.
“My car isn’t up here ... so they can’t poop on it,” said sophomore A.J. Spicca. “It’s not a big deal to me.”
But it is a huge deal to Gary Thomas, an OPP employee who was out for vengeance last night. Thomas was walking near the creamery recently when a crow made a mess on his shoe.
“I don’t know how it missed me,” Thomas recalled. “But they were white shoes, so…”
Between 2008 and 2009 OPP has spent $3,500 on materials for “crow harassment,” Smith said. About 30 hours of manpower were invested last night.
By 7 p.m., most of the crows evacuated campus.
The battle was won. But the war is far from over. Crows aren’t as dumb as they look. They’ll be back, Smith said.
“They’re smart animals. It may take days or weeks to get them to where we want them to go,” said Ruskin. “This is much more than a one night stand.”
Caption: Dave Brown, of Penn State's Office of Physical Plant, launches pyrotechnic noisemakers in the university's crow relocation program on Monday, Dec. 7, 2009. CDT/Craig Houtz 
While babysitting today, me and the kids heard this loud racket outside. We ran out and saw, to our amazement....thousands of crows...circling...crowing...just around dusk. It was awesome! 
